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Richardson!

As perfect as Dartmouth is, you're not always going to enjoy every academic pursuit. It's natural! In high school, it was natural to have subjects you loved and excelled at and subjects you found less interesting or really struggled with. In college, I feel like struggling with a class you really don't enjoy is less commonly talked about, but it's an experience that most people will encounter at Dartmouth.

For me, the class that did me in was Computer Science 1, a classic class at Dartmouth that nearly 25% of the freshman class will enroll in during their first year. While I had no experience with Computer Science and knew CS would push me outside of my comfort zone, I decided to enroll. I heard great things about the class and if all my classmates enjoyed it, how bad could it be?

7 weeks into the term, I can confidently say that CS1 is kicking my butt. It's a fast paced class in which many kids have prior experience coding, it requires patience with the iterative process (a skill I lack), and a it's massive time commitment. Have I enjoyed it at times? Absolutely. Have I also determined that this is the last Computer Science class I will ever take?

Yes.

CS has lectures 3 times a week, a mandatory small group recitation once a week, and concept hours once a week. At minimum, it's a 5 hour time commitment. On top of the physical in class time, there are 2 short assignments and a lab assigned for homework, and a exam every 2 weeks. It is a huge amount of time for a single class. For people who find the work rewarding, it feels like a great use of time. But for people for whom CS doesn't spark joy, it can feel like an anvil on your term.

For the first few weeks, I tried to enjoy it by leaning into the discomfort and expanding my comfort zone! I realized that while this was a valiant effort, it was also a futile one. I came to the realization that I don't HAVE to enjoy everything I try. The power of elimination can be equally as powerful as the power of discovery. While some of my friends might love computer science (a lot of people decide to pursue the CS major because of CS1), I'm glad to now know that my academic pursuits won't lie in computer science.

So what now?

I'm doing a few things to make sure this class doesn't entirely stain my term.

First, I'm setting a time limit for myself on how much time I can spend on CS on any given day. It's been great realizing that I do not have to work away at something I do not enjoy for a single grade.

Second, I'm asking for help! A lot! From both the TA's and the professors. They are super helpful and there's Office Hours for CS1 every day! 

Third, I'm leaning into the things I do enjoy, like writing and running, and reminding myself that my skills lie elsewhere. Life will continue on, and hopefully, it'll be entirely for-loop free. 

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